"Testament of Youth"
From “Testament of Youth” by Vera Brittain
I chose to write about 3 quotes from the excerpt which describes Vera’s life during war in which she loses both her fiance and her brother.
“However, there was nothing to do in the midst of one’s family but practice that concealment of fear which the long years of war had instilled, thrusting it inward until one’s subconscious became a regular prison house of the apprehensions and inhibitions which were later to take their revenge.” (Brittain, 79)
“My mother, who had not yet received the letters from Italy, had said empathetically that she did not want to hear any details, but though I dreaded more than death whatever I might be self condemned to learn, I was driven and impelled by a remorseless determination to find out as much as I could.” (Brittain, 82)
“There was no rush to poems now, no black quotation book, no little library of consecrated volumes; we never had a late meal nor changed one item of our dull routine. I felt enormously, interminably tired; that was all. One had to go on living because it was less trouble than finding a way out.” (Brittain, 86)
The first quote describes what it was like during the war. Vera says that everyone was scared about losing loved ones, but nobody would show it. She compares a mind to a prison house insinuating that they are trapped and helpless. They have no idea if their loved ones are safe and they have to sit in their thoughts until they get confirmation that they are alive.
The second and third quote explain how people deal with death. Vera and her mother dealt with death very differently. Her mother did not want to know any details while Vera needed to know everything in order to cope. They are both doing what they think is best for them and their pain. Vera goes on to explain in the third quote that the deaths had a big impact on her and that after they passed she felt tired. Even though she was destroyed by their deaths, she had to keep going because that is what is expected of her.
Word Count: 365
I like how you compared her thoughts to a prison in her mind. Vera had so many racing thoughts after reading the news paper each time and she had yet to hear back from her brother. I think the fact that after the death Vera continued living life normal as if nothing ever happened had an impact on her because she never took time to mourn, she just continued on. I think that this may have been the factor that led her into a depression. She spent so much time trying to figure out what exactly happened, which could have been her way of coping, but she never got the answers she was really looking for.
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